Archive for January, 2012

I’ve lost my routine, and routines are important to me. When I’m between things I am agitated, restless, irritable, broody, and can settle into nothing. Mornings, afternoons and evenings jarringly pass with the motions of a learner’s kangerooing car, shaped by nothing but pacings from one activity to another, none of which lessens the edginess or the urgency of feeling that I need to be doing something else.

Waking this morning I wanted to run. A thermos of green tea by my bed, I drank and read for a while, but, tired from being unable to sleep last night, I found myself flitting from one book to another, and, what was more destabilising, between these and Twitter. I couldn’t find the banana I had put aside for breakfast last night which, silly as it sounds, threw me further. I had intended to read for a while, drink tea, eat breakfast, and, when I was out of tea, get on my running shoes and go for a run. (more…)